do it motherfucker, do it!
pull the fucking trigger, lay me out.
do it! i swear to god, just do it, put me
out of my misery. if you wont do it hand me
the gun, i'll blast myself. fine you wont do it?
im sure for enough money someone out there would do it.
i could even add a cute suicide note so it wont seem like anything.
i cant beat myself, well thats all ive been doing., beating myself up.
but i cant defeat myself. yeah thats the right word. i cant escape, cant run,
no place to run. okay, i cant make them the way id want them to be. they'll have to
grow up and i'll have to move on. enough of the shit bryan. gather the peices of your heart and we're out of here. can you see past her? look, theres the suset, theres the ocean. other things are beutiful. but you just dont understand. she put in color to my life. like a coloring book. have your hope and shut up. dream dont whine. dont bitch to them. i feel horrible. as i said fake. maybe why she dosent
see as torn as i am is because im just not pretty enough. maybe the crap on my face is reminders that im real, human. and she's looking for an edward. but i am him. im so much more. can you see me? maybe im over reacting. with a daeth in the family and the death of my hero. bruce wayne. but i must think that he'll live forever. it dosent matter who's behind the mask right? (say right) i need solid answers here.
i need something to be strong enough to stand my days. i have very few ways but i wont touch them. im afriad to break them. you see, my mind use to be like a beautiful house. untill depression came along and destoryed my home. but in the mist of it all i stood there. i stayed because its still home. in away it was wonderful, i was no longer contained like an animal behind those four walls. not anymore. at first i couldnt handle it but learned it. loved it later. my mind was free, my mind no longer knew any boundries. none. the ruins and lines where still there tho, of the walls, in my home. id enter on room and i thought of it like walking into a state of mind. if i needed a change i could easily just hop over the ruin and go into the next room. well does the wall make the room? ugh, nvm but lately ive wondered away from the familar ruins of my home. i dont know were i am. come into my mind like parkman and save me? pull me out? but my mind is a dangerous place. sometimes to blank. at others so busy and violent. ive driven myself to xreams during the vacation. did i worry you today? i was freaking out, and i couldnt find water, they were ither so short or were broken and i didnt know, im so shakey. hold me? but im so stobborn, id yell at you to go away, to not touch me, or maybe it depends on who you are. what do i need? only i can win. im not the guy to be with, you cant handle me. do you even see me that way? you make things so okay but the way you act makes me think you want me gone. do you not want me to touch you? im crying now. and yeah i'll admit it. baby help me